so it’s his birthday today – 26 minutes ago. He’s written to me asking me to come to him of course but I haven’t. It feels strange to be here when he is there with open arms. Those arms are uncaring and unfeeling arms. They are strong and wrap around me but they are false. Their physical strength hides their weakness of heart. If I went to him I would put B and I back into that vicious cycle that I have been trapped if for 5 years. I want so much to be loved and I know that may never happen but I have to believe it can and that I shouldn’t settle for less. I want to feel loving arms (preferably from a tall man) around me again. I want to feel love for them and feel the love emanate from them. Who knows if that is my fate but for now my fate is to be here alone and to experience unrequited love from false arms. It doesn’t feel very good, in fact it’s painful and. It hurts, but there it is, the truth often does
TasteJunkie 